Every league is going to be chock full of unimaginative, boring team names like Sith Lords or KLM1972 or Colorado Cubs. It’s awful. Me being the type to harp over a team name longer than I do when I’m debating on whether to use my #1 waiver priority on Johnny Cueto or not, I’m generally proud of the names I come up with.
While I’m on the subject, you may play with a team named this, and I have a friend who has played with me for years and he one day decided to not only use it, but claim that HE, in fact, was the first to use it. I’m here to stake claim to The Money Shots right here and now. Feel free to use it, but like Richard Lewis with “the (blank) from hell.” I just want you to know who coined the team name.
Let’s delve into the magnificent world of some of the more offensive fantasy baseball team names, some of which I played against, some of which I just made up for this article:
12. Moises Alou’s Pee Hands
11. Brett Myers’ Fist
10. Peter Gammons is a ZOMBIE!
9. Wang on Min Chien
8. Playing With Dick Pole
7. TP For My Pujols
6. Kevin Mitchell’s Cat Head
5. Kruk’s Testicle
4. McNamee Shot In My Ass
3. Ozzie Guillen’s Goddamn Motherfuckers
2. Corey Lidle Flight Plan
1. Coolbaugh’s Brain
Got anything more offensive? I’d love to hear them. Post away, you heartless scumbags!
Hmmm...I got nothin'...






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My friend always calls his team the Virgin Surgeons. That one always makes me laugh.
The most offensive one from our leagues was from fantasy football in the days of all white QB’s–”10 Black Guys and a White Guy.”
The Knuckle Children was good. My friends name in MLB is Twuat Hammer.
One’s I have used in the past “I Banged Your Mom” and “The Perineal Masseurs”
“Aborted Feti” is a classic.
The Queens Collapse
Jose Gayes
Delgado’s $16 Mil
The Aaron Heilman’s
Mid 90s Mets
23 Ringless Years
There you go mets fans
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