When The Donkey Show Gets Boring

by Polish Powerhouse

May 23, 2008

I was listening to ESPN Radio a few minutes ago and the two top headlines of the day were: Pac-Man Jones owes $20K to Caesar’s Palace and Ross Tucker, former offensive lineman for the Patriots, says Belichick used Injured Reserve players for practice.

Really?

Is this what we’ve succumb to? These are the major headlines in sports today? My immediate reaction to both stories: So what?! It’s time to put an end to the witch hunt. My favorite part of these stories is how every news outlet out there drops the same indignant line making reference to how ridiculous it is that “the media” keeps us wrapped up in these stories. As if all those OTHER media outlets are to blame. COME ON! You’re all to blame (except this one, obviously)! So, just cut it out already!

First off, what’s the big deal with Pac-Man gmabling? Did anyone expect that he would finish his suspension and come back a church goer with a penchant for adopting hungry children in Bosnia? The guy’s got to have fun, and his fun doesn’t involve Habitat for Humanity. What makes this story even WORSE is that the debt is from Labor Day of LAST year! We’re talking about 7 months ago! Doesn’t it seem pretty damn obvious that this story was built off the equally unnecessary Charles Barkley story’s influence?

Everyone got up in arms over Barkley’s debt, which was 20 times more substantial, so why wouldn’t this story about sports talk darling, Pac-Man Jones send ratings through the roof! Oh, people will get riled up. They sure will. On the radio they were calling for his suspension from the league again. They were wondering if the Cowboys would just go ahead and terminate his contract.

Jumpin’ Jesus on a pogo stick, people! It’s gambling! People lose money everyday. But, the fact that it’s Pac-Man Jones makes it punishment by crucifixion.

I’m neither a Pac-Man supporter or apologist, but this latest outrage is a stretch.

Next up, Ross Tucker agrees with Matt Walsh that the Patriots used IR guys during practice. Once again…SO FUCKING WHAT?! What is an injured reserve guy but a blocking dummy that reacts to snap counts? I know it’s against the rules and all that, but is it really cause for outrage? No. I have an idea, though. Why not swing by Wal-Mart and grab six or seven of those hunchbacked sofa weights that run the registers and let them stand there and get smashed about. It’s fun for everyone, and the hunchbacks get their “Look momma! I’m on the TV!” moments.

Once again, I say, stop the donkey show! Everyone got their peek, and we laughed, but now we’re all just kind of fed up and disgusted with watching these guys get defiled by a big dumb animal.

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