And So Cassels Made Of Sand Fall In The Sea, Eventually…

March 3, 2009

Over the weekend, Matt Cassel, former clipboard holder for Carson Palmer, Matt Leinart, and Tom Brady, was traded to the Kansas City Chiefs. From the sounds of it, you would have though that Tom Brady had dumped Gisele Bundchen for Tub Girl (if you don’t know, I wouldn’t recommend Googling that one).

The trade in question goes like this: Matt Cassel and Mike Vrabel for a 2nd round pick (#34 overall). Actually let me break that down further: The Patriots traded a QB who had not started a football game since the year 2000 and a line backer who will be 34 this season…for what’s behind curtain #2, and the car and the kitchenette and the vacation in Barcelona are all still available.

I gotta say, when the news came in while I was in my car on my phone, I said, “Damn, Belichick did it again!” But, of course, I’m not easily blinded by pigs in silk hats, either.

I mean, honestly people! Where’s the big problem here? But…But…he traded with his homey Pioli! That’s some diabolical shit! You’re RIGHT! But, not in the way you mean. It’s diabolical because Belichick said, “Welcome to the big show, Scottie boy! Here’s a big wooden horse I built for you!” He traded an old man in a high impact position and a QB that he didn’t need anyway, whose value hasn’t been higher since he was a junior in high school, for youth.

Let’s face this fact, as much as you may hate Belichick and his grumpy frumpiness, the man is a front office gypsy. We’re talking about the man who got Randy Moss for a single 4th round pick. We’re talking about the man who cashed in on Deion Branch’s hold out following the Super Bowl MVP season to the tune of a 1st round pick. Since leaving New England, Branch has gone on to average 11 games per season and 54 yards per game.

Trust me, when all the people calm down that Belichick is hiding the Roswell space aliens in his basement, we will get to sit back and watch Matt Cassel do his best Brodie Croyle impression while Mike Vrabel gives the Chiefs another year or so of declining effort.

Maybe then, everybody will sit back and enjoy the fact that DAMN! Belichick did it again!

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4. 2009 Sleepers & Busters – QB Edition
5. When The Donkey Show Gets Boring