Mark Prior Haunts My Children

So, for Christmas last year, my wife’s stepfather bought my oldest son a Todd MacFarlane Mark Prior figure since we’re both big Cubs fans and her stepfather’s not a big enough baseball fan to know that Prior is both no longer a Cub and a huge bust. It was a genuinely nice gesture all the same.

Anyhow, the figure sits on a shelf above my younger son’s bed in their bedroom. One night, my middle son was pitching a fit about not wanting to put on his pajamas. I tried reasoning with him, but no dice. Finally, I took down the Mark Prior figure and said, “Uh oh… You’re making Mark Prior angry. Mark Prior’s gonna get you!”

He looked at the figure, stopped freaking out, and put on his pajamas. To this day if he’s freaking out, all I have to say is, “Uh oh… Mark Prior’s gonna hear you freaking out.” and he’s calm instantly.

I just thought that was a funny story. Probably the most dominating Mark Prior’s been in a long time…

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1. Mark Teixeira/Calamity Jane: Separated At Birth

Tags: Fart, Mark Prior, Todd McFarlane